The New York Post had a piece the other day on how Bernie "Bambi" (thanks to Stick Michael for that one) Williams is considering retirement. But I don't want to see the guy go! The Junkees are so much more fun to watch with one of the AL's worst centerfielders. Not to mention Bernie's steadily declining power and average numbers. What was his last big hit? That homer in game 1 of the '96 ALCS? What was that, almost ten years ago?
Considering the Yanks didn't get Beltran, they oughta pick up Bernie's option next year. Joe Snorre needs some more late '90's guys in the clubhouse to make up for Brown, Sheffield, and A-Schmuck. Maybe they can get Bernie to pull off a Dale Sveum '98 and have him just serve as a bullpen catcher. And in true Yankee style, pay Bambi $13 million for it.
And who would take over for Bernie, anyway? Beltran is in Queens. Damon, a free agent after this year, is as appealing to Junkee fans as Pedro. Besides, Jesus Damon hits better with long hair and beard. And the farm is barren. Perhaps to appeal to a few pathetic Schmet fans (and to make up for Bernie's lack of defense), the Junkees will trade for Mike Cameron. But even washed-up Bernie can hit better than Cameron. So the Yankees have to keep Bernie!
And I'm sorry, Stick Michael, but the Bernie-Bambi comparison is inaccurate. Bambi has a better throwing arm.
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