How Sweep It Is! Rockies 4, Junkees 3: Tragic Numbers 82, 86

What a day. Roger Clemens struggled big time. I know, he didn't give up a ton of runs, but anytime you throw 90 pitches in 4.1 innings, you know you don't have your best stuff. I'm sorry, 4 earned runs in 4+ innings is not why you're getting $18 million! Seven hits and a walk in 4+ innings - he's lucky they didn't score more runs.

Props to the bullpen -- Snorre's boyfriend in particular (Scott Proctor) -- pitching a scoreless rest-of-game, but it wasn't enough as the offense, once again, faltered.

Johnny Damon is absolutely killing them. He's now batting .249 with no power, and has no business playing. As I've said a zillion times, if you're injured, go on the freakin' DL. Who knows - perhaps there's an element of PR that the guy has never been on the DL, and gosh darnit, they intend to keep it that way even if he can't move.

Abreu, ever since that 4 for 4 day is 6-28, also known as a .214 batting average. Cairo's doing nothing, and Andy Phillips can't buy a hit. Otherwise, the Yanks had opportunities but sqaundered them. In the series, they went 1-18 with runners in scoring position.

But not to worry, Snorre and Clemens had plenty of excuses: "I was taking deep breaths on the mound. My mouth got dry a couple times," Clemens said. "That was the more difficult part. Heat or cold is not a big deal. The one inning a storm blew in and the wind changed direction. The wind hit my chest and caused me to throw the ball out of the zone. But I made the adjustment. Then, the wind started to blow straight out." Can't make this stuff up.

So now it's on to San Francisco. We'll see what happens. Kei Igawa pitches Game 1, so we may as well pencil in another Yankee loss. Then Wang on Saturday and Mussina on Sunday. The Giants are a lousy team, they don't score any runs, but the pitching is not bad. In this series, they have (in order) Matt Cain, who's pitched way better than his 2-7 record, Matt Morris, who's having a really good year, and Noah Lowry, who has underachieved. I'm actually glad they don't face Zito, who stinks this year.

Because of the anemic offense of the Giants, I wouldn't be shocked if Old York takes 2 out of 3, but I wouldn't mind another series loss or sweep.

Flunkees Fail Big Test

Two weeks ago, I wrote about how the series against Chicago, the Mets, Boston, and the Angels would tell us whether these Yankees can win this year.

Well, a 4-8 run tells us all we need to know. After George's comments and getting swept by the Angels, the Yankees are a game out of the cellar. This is not April anymore. The season's about 1/3 of the way done, and this team stinks.

Damon refuses to go on the DL and will remain a part-time player. Coco Crisp never looked this good (and he had quite the web gem today). But even if the Yanks sidelined Damon, Melky Cabrera (.219) is not an option. Abreu has bounced all around the lineup, and still can't hit. Cano (.375 in the last week) looks like he's doing better. A-Rod (.227 in the last week) does not.

The Yanks pen is still in bad shape. Proctor blew it today, and Luis Vizcaino is not helping Cashman's job security.

The Red Sox and Mets sweep, making it a great weekend. The Yanks-Sox series seems like a million years ago, as the deficit is now 12.5 games. And Beckett is coming back.

When it comes down to it, this team can't win. The outfield is terrible, 1B is a joke, and the '06 A-Rod is making a comeback, as is the '04-'05 foot-in-mouth Jason Giambi.

- The Blue Jays looked done when Halladay and Ryan went down, but they've got a better record than the Yanks. With Clippard and DeSalvo pitching two games, they've got a pretty good shot at taking two of three.

Yankees Sweep Texas

All the talk of Joe Snorre's job security has faded, as the Yanks swept Texas. I know a win's a win, but you can't get too excited here.

First off, Texas, as a team, is all about their hitting. Their pitching has been terrible for years; even when they made the playoffs, they had no shot with also-rans like Aaron Sele, Rick Helling, and Darren Oliver. And in '07, Kameron Loe and Vincente Padilla are nothing to write home about. So if they can't score 7 runs, they're done. And with the exception of rookie Ian Kinsler, the hitting has stunk. Young, Blalock, and Teixera have struggled, and Brad Wilkerson and Kenny Lofton don't scare anyone.

So their getting hammered by the Yankees doesn't mean anything. To Texas's credit, they still got Mussina and Pettitte to throw a lot of pitches and leave early. And at this rate, Luis Vizcaino will last about as long as Carlos Almanzar.

- The saga with conditioning coach Marty Miller reminds me of the last Yankees strength and conditioning fiasco - the "Bronx Burners" of 1982. Which, of course, was the first year of a 13-year playoff drought in the Bronx.

- Next up, Yanks and Seattle. Seattle has played decent ball thus far, but if Felix Hernandez doesn't stay healthy, they're done. Especially with Weaver and Batista in the rotation. Bill Bavasi can duke it out with Kevin Malone for "worst GM in the west."

- Kei Igawa goes tonight. Let's see if last week's performance was just a fluke.

Cellar Dwelling

Yeah, it's only April, but there's never a bad time to see the Yankees in last place. Even the return of Wang couldn't save them tonight. Kazmir pitched well for Tampa Bay. Did a good job keeping A-Rod's bat quiet.

And the Yankees pen was bad again, with Myers giving up the big hit to Crawford.

If the Yanks are worried about preserving the arms of the bullpen, then bringing up Phil Hughes is a dumb move. The guy will be on a serious pitch count, and as soon as he hits 80 pitches, they'll be warming guys up. For all I know, Hughes might turn out to be one of those guys who's very efficient and can throw a 75-pitch complete game. As a raw rookie, I highly doubt that will happen. Instead, Hughes will likely contribute to the bullpen woes.

Seventeen Years in the Waiting

You know how long it's been since the Sox last swept the Yanks at Fenway? In that series, they started Chuck Cary, Andy Hawkins, and Mike Witt. Who would probably match up pretty well against Pettitte, Karstens, and Chase Wright, but anyway. The Sox hit .363 in the series.

It was a great series, and not just because the Sox swept. Friday and Sunday were classic Yankee-Red Sox games, and after a rocky beginning, Josh Beckett looked like guy we saw in '03.

Matsuzaka and Schilling struggled, and I wasn't expecting that. I certainly wasn't expecting the Yankee bullpen to perform as badly as they did. Rivera's performance reminded me of 2001, with Coco Crisp's triple bringing echoes of Tony Womack. On this blog last year, I predicted that Crisp would be better than Damon, so you know damn well I'm rooting for that to be a turning point. And Proctor did not make a good case for being Rivera's successor, giving up a 3-run homer to Mike Lowell. I love how Lowell was a salary-dump throw-in in the Beckett deal last year, but has come a long way since his abysmal '05 campaign.

And I don't wanna hear the Yankees bellyache about injuries. You still have the highest payroll in the game. Get a little depth. Josh Phelps is your big bat off the bench? The Yanks have fallen mightily since their bench had Glenallen Hill, Jose Canseco, and a bunch of needles on the floor.

- So I'll enjoy this sweep. At least till this coming weekend.